by Dr. Jamie Turndorf
For 27 years I was married to the love of my life, Jean Pin. For most of his life, Jean had been one of the most famous Jesuit priests in history–a religious pioneer who taught at the Vatican and founded a movement called Liberation Theology designed to fight church oppression from within.
While Jean’s life was steeped in religion, I, on the other hand, was raised by two “devout” atheists who taught me not to believe in God or the afterlife!
My lack of belief was abruptly shattered the moment my husband died of a bee sting. His astonishing manifestations–often in front of witnesses–have proven to me that we don’t die and that our relationships need not end in death. In the first-part of Love Never Dies, I share some of the many amazing examples of his ongoing presence.
As a result of my discovery that we don’t die, I was led to create my groundbreaking new Trans-Dimensional Grief. My method vastly diverges from the Western approach–grieve, let go and move on, which only leaves the bereaved at a greater loss. My method, by contrast, guides the bereaved to say hello, not good-bye.
Since 2006, I have been assisting grieving patients worldwide to do just this and the healing that has resulted is astonishing. The bereaved can be in touch to whatever degree they desire. Reconnecting is especially vital for those who have lost a loved one to sudden illness or tragic death. These people have been robbed of the chance to say farewell and, if needed, to make amends.
While some may simply wish to reestablish contact in the early stages of loss to help work through the grieving process, there are many other cases in which ongoing connection is desirable. For example, reconnecting and staying connected is a lifeline, especially for the elderly who may not wish to form another primary attachment. Likewise, parents who have lost children desperately need long-term contact, as do children who have lost parents.
My point is, reconnecting with a deceased loved one and staying connected is a form of healing that cannot be measured or prescribed. Of course, the wonder of it all is that, as you will see, you don’t have to say au revoir to anyone dearly departed because you can reunite with your loved ones sooner than you thought.
But reconnecting is just the beginning. After a parent, sibling, partner, or spouse has died, millions of people harbor resentment toward the deceased, often as a result of having been abused or mistreated by that person. Unfortunately, traditional Western therapy offers no method for resolving this unfinished business. In contrast, my method provides a solution for the millions who suffer.
Inspired by Jean’s revelations regarding the transformations that occur after death, I now know that when someone enters spirit form, that being has—at the very least—a clearer perspective on the mistakes that he or she made on earth. This awareness sets the stage for reconciliation. While it’s true that some beings are waiting with open arms to make peace and shower us with love, others may need a little more nudging.
But even the most un-evolved beings know that their own spiritual progression requires them to right their wrongs by making amends with those living here. This means that it’s never too late to heal wounds, resolve resentments, make peace, and repair a damaged relationship with someone who has passed over; and that in death it is possible to resolve issues that never could have been addressed during a person’s lifetime.
As one of my patients said, “I wish my mother would hurry up and die so we can work this out.”
Thanks to my new method, for the first time in history, it is finally possible to heal unfinished business and repair a damaged relationship with someone who has passed.
Here’s a good example of what I mean:
On my first Good Friday following Jean’s passing, I felt led to visit a woman named Laurie who sells exotic birds. I hadn’t spoken to her or seen her in five years, since we put Fluffy, our beloved canary, to sleep. I knew nothing of her personal life.
As I approached her house, I felt that I’d been sent to help her and one of her birds. As soon as I walked inside, she showed me a young female finch that was dying. She explained that finches can’t go more than a day without food, and this little one hadn’t eaten for a day. Laurie said that she wouldn’t last much longer.
The bird sat motionless on the perch. Her feathers were puffed up.
I asked Laurie if I could try to heal the bird and she agreed, so I walked over to the birdcage and pressed my face to the thin metal bars. Normally having someone come this close would distress a bird. This creature was not distressed.
As I began talking to the bird, she became aware of my presence and then became excited. She started jumping up and down and even began flying!
I told her aloud that I wanted her to go to her seed bowl and begin eating. The bird obeyed me immediately. The more the she ate, the stronger she became and the more she wanted to eat. By this point, she was scarfing up seeds like a miniature vacuum cleaner.
It was then that I felt a tidal wave of love and realized that it was Jean who had led me here. In this elegantly orchestrated manifestation, he was simultaneously blessing Laurie by allowing me to save her bird, and also giving me the blessing of saving her little bird the way I couldn’t save Fluffy.
I then sensed two spirit presences surrounding Laurie. I picked up an extreme sense of urgency, as though they were beating down my door in their eagerness to speak to her. I also had the sense that they’d been waiting for a long time to reach her and that they were relieved that I’d heard the call and was there to help them talk to her.
At that moment, I saw that the bird had sensed their presence as well. She looked distressed again and had started stretching her head heavenward. It occurred to me that the spirit presences surrounding Laurie may have been upsetting the little creature and may have caused her sickness.
I told the bird aloud not to worry about these spirits. While speaking aloud may make it easier for me to transmit a clear energetic message, I’ve also silently communicated a message to animals and they have understood me all the same. In this case, I spoke aloud because I wanted Laurie to hear what I was saying. I was here to help Laurie with the spirits, and the bird should return to her meal. She did!
I then heard a female spirit presence say to Laurie, I am so sorry that I was such a weakling and didn’t protect you. When I repeated the word weakling to Laurie, it struck me as an odd term, certainly not one that I would ever use.
I sensed that it was Laurie’s mother speaking, but I didn’t know that Laurie’s mother was dead.
I asked Laurie if these words made sense to her. She said that they did and confirmed that, indeed, it was her mother speaking. She added that her mother always used the word weakling. I’ve come to realize that not only Jean but also other spirits validate their presence by using figures of speech that were idiosyncratic to them.
I then heard her mother expanding on her previous message. She said, I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect you from your father.
Laurie again confirmed that this was true.
At that moment I felt a man desperately trying to reach out to Laurie. I said, “There’s a man who wants to speak to you. He wants you to know you’re safe. He can’t hurt you anymore.”
As I said that, I felt my eyes being drawn to a cranberry-colored blown-glass ball hanging from the ceiling. I was momentarily confused since I’d purchased an identical item as a gift for someone around five years before, but in that moment I couldn’t recall to whom I’d given it. I asked Laurie if I’d given the ornament to her. She said no, that she’d bought the “witching” ball to protect her from the spirit of her father.
I then realized that her father had drawn my attention to the ball as a way to get her to talk about her ongoing fear of him.
“I am still afraid of him,” Laurie told me.
Her father replied, I’m not asking you to forgive me. For your own sake as well as mine, all I ask is that you confront me. Now is the time to make me face up to what I did to you. Don’t protect me. You need this for your own healing. And I need you to help me face the truth in order for me to evolve spiritually.
This experience was a first for me and it utterly amazed me. I had discovered that, in order to progress spiritually, those who have passed over actually need us to help them in their evolution!
Here’s the beauty of this process. As we help those in spirit to evolve, we’re helping ourselves. As this example shows, Laurie had remained frozen in time, trapped in childhood, because the feelings associated with the trauma she suffered as a child hadn’t been resolved. So, she continued to drown in the terror of a young girl who doesn’t feel safe.
Dialoguing with her father, through me, was just what she needed to help them both heal and evolve. By the time I left that day, Laurie was already standing taller and felt less afraid of her father. And her little bird made it, too!
I am thrilled to share my new Dialoguing with the Departed technique, which enables anyone (even non-believers) to simply re-establish communication and/or heal unfinished business with someone who’s died.
As you will soon discover, reconnecting is the secret to transforming grief to joy.
About the author:
Dr. Jamie Turndorf is the author of Love Never Dies: How to Reconnect and Make Peace with the Deceased. A famed relationship therapist, author, and media personality, Dr. Turndorf has created a groundbreaking new grief therapy method that combines her acclaimed conflict-resolution techniques with after-death communication. The result: an unprecedented method that enables the bereaved to reconnect, heal unfinished business, and make peace with the deceased. Find out more at: AskDrLove.com