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by Meriflor Toneatto
When women are empowered with money, they become “difference makers.” They transform not only their own lives but also those of their children, their families, and their communities at large. In her new book Money, Manifestation & Miracles: A Guide to Transforming Women’s Relationships with Money, award-winning leadership and coaching executive Meriflor Toneatto empowers women to extend their limits so they can create the life of their dreams. We hope you’ll enjoy this short excerpt from the book.
Both women and men harbor many beliefs about money that originate from childhood, social conditioning, and life experiences. More often than not these beliefs come from a place of lack rather than abundance.
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One common belief is: “Money is the root of all evil.” However, this is a reinterpretation of the original phrase from the Bible, which is: “The love of money is the root of all evil.” People who believe that money itself is evil usually want to distance themselves from money. As a result, they have an internal resistance to earning it, saving it, managing it, or handling it.
Another common belief is that money is scary. Having money, investments, and assets can be frightening and threatening for some people. These fears likely stem from past experiences of feeling uneasy about being perceived as wealthy, of having family and friends asking for loans, or feeling victimized regarding money. They likely want to stay under the radar, and perhaps be underearners, finding this easier than being vulnerable to being envied for their wealth or to being defrauded.
For women, I have found four key money beliefs that can hold them back from moving to the next level in their professional growth. The first common belief is: “It’s not about the money. I just want to help lots of people.” There is an underlying belief that making more money is selfish, greedy, and/or not spiritual. Often the result is that these individuals are underearning and overgiving in their work, leading to burnout and resentment. If this is the case for you, please understand that generating more money through your life’s work enables you to reach more people. It is a synergistic flow. Money provides you with more choices to fuel the mission you are passionate about creating; to enjoy a better quality of life for yourself and your family; and to fund your social promise by, for example, contributing to a favorite cause.
The second commonly held belief that can hold women back is: “I have to have everything in place before I can take the next big step.” This concept is closely tied to being a perfectionist and becoming distracted with what others are doing. This can lead to thinking that more training is required or that you need to obtain more credentials before fully stepping up in your work, promoting yourself, being more visible, and becoming a leader.
The third common belief is: “I can’t make more than I did in my previous position.” This is particularly the case with businesswomen who have had a high level of success in their past jobs. There is an underlying assumption that they may not be able to repeat their previous standard of achievement. The internal dialogue includes questions such as “What if I fail?” and “What will people think of me?” In some cases, these women have created a ceiling for themselves, thinking they can never break it. In truth, as a businesswoman, you have an opportunity to make more money than ever before. This can happen when you give yourself permission to make more, and when you are willing to break free of your limiting, self-sabotaging beliefs.
The fourth common belief is: “My clients won’t pay that much” or “I can’t ask for a raise in my job.” If this rings true for you, this may stem from some form of undervaluing yourself, your skills, and the value and benefits you provide, which can prevent you from charging and getting paid what you are worth. This can be an unproductive cycle that can impact your self-confidence. The reality is that it is not our place to make decisions for someone else. When you are aligned and empowered with who you are and the value you provide, your ideal clients or customers will be those who also value the investment they are making in themselves by working with you. This also extends to feeling confident about requesting a raise in your job because doing so expresses the value and contribution you provide to the organization.
In nurturing a positive mind-set, you will need to be in an environment with like-minded people who are successful and wealthy, because this will help motivate you. They can serve as role models, demonstrating that you too can have success. The key element is for you to fully show up and play a much bigger game in your business or career. The best way to accomplish this is by shifting your money mind-set to one that is more empowering.
About the author:
Meriflor Toneatto is the author of Money, Manifestation & Miracles. As the CEO and founder of Power With Soul, she specializes in helping ambitious women entrepreneurs, professionals and leaders reach financial prosperity and success while fulfilling their social promise to the world. Her work has been featured internationally in media outlets like Yahoo! Finance, Washington Post, International Business Times, Los Angeles Times, and more. Visit her online at www.meriflor.co.